


Learning How to be a Big Boy

by DLdaddy



Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: Anal Play, Anal Sex, Babysitting, Bedwetting, Boy Cunt, Boypussy, Diapers, M/M, Manipulation, Mind Games, Mind Manipulation, Multi, Non-Consensual Oral Sex, Oral Sex, Other, Rough Oral Sex, Small Penis, Underage Prostitution, Underage Rape/Non-con, boy whore, boytoy, diaper boy, fucktoy, non-consensual anal sex, older teen/young boy, pimped out, pussy boy, rough anal sex, sharing with friends, teen/boy, treated as property
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:47:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29366514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DLdaddy/pseuds/DLdaddy
Summary: Story of my childhood and some of the more drastic events that shaped me.  This is also a record of some of the severe sexual abuse I suffered and just a few of the issues that I have now had to deal with for life because of what was done to me and how I was treated by my abusers.  They did not care about me or how I felt or how much it hurt, just about getting their release and then ways to make $$ or other items while sharing me with his friends.  The final chapter will include an update on how many of these issues have affected me thru life and also what I have learned from seeking help to deal with them.  I think writing and sharing this will also help me deal with the issues and help end/reduce the nightmares and night terrors I still have at times.
Relationships: Original Male Character & Original Male Character, Original Male Character/Original Male Character
Kudos: 15





	1. How it started

**Author's Note:**

> When this started I was 8 and John was 17 I think I think he was a Junior in HS. Ely was in my class and the same age, but moved not long after this started. I envied him for what kept him safe, and I wanted them so bad to keep me safe and so I could be a Little boy too.
> 
> Please remember, looking is fine, fantasizing is great, but NEVER harm a boy and take away his innocence, as it can never be replaced. 
> 
> I have been asked by a few friends and a person at my old therapy group, a question. : If I had not been forced, used and hurt, by John, and instead if it had been a kind, caring and loving relationship, how would I have felt. .. I will answer that in the conclusion of this story. So you got to read on. 

This is my FIRST attempt to write a story or any type, besides what I had to do in school all those years ago. It is based on my memories of the events. 

  
Most Importantly please remember that it is fine to read, fantasize, dream and look at boys, but it is NEVER OKAY to HURT THEM. Don't steal their innocence! Boys deserve to know that they are loved and wanted, and that is done with hugs and positive re-enforcing comments. Not used and abused by someone that wants them as a sex object or “toy” to satisfy their lustful and selfish needs. Thanks. 

[T/b, b/b (oral and anal) next will include TTT/b]

Learning How to be a Big Boy [AKA My life story and the lasting effects of childhood events

  
  


When I was growing up I was the older of two children. My younger sister is a couple years younger than I am, and handicapped severely. So I was protective of her but also that meant that she got most of the attention growing up. My toys would be broken by her often a day or 2 after I got them on my birthday or Christmas. Even when they within a month of each other, so the few I got for my B-day were even more special, since most the family forgot my B-day because it was only a few weeks after Xmas. :( I was always told she didn't mean to. But when you're aged 6 – 9 when your toy that you had just got for Christmas or your birthday the day or two before is destroyed it still hurts. Even if it was not intentional it still hurts. It hurts even more when your parents don't seem to grasp that pain you're suffering because of it and kind of tell you to grow up. I never had a normal childhood because of that. I was always the one that my friends, the few (3) I had, would have negotiate for them when they wanted something from their parents, like staying over or going to play. This was mostly after I was 10 because before that I had a 2 friends and really they were not much of a friend looking back. Both of them were using and manipulating of me in different ways.

  
My little life went totally upside down the during the spring after my 8th bday. Our neighbor across the small side, we lived at the corner, had a teenage soon (John), 16 or 17 as he could drive. I thought that was cool. I never knew what the car was but know I know it to be a Convertible Mustang, 1965-1966. 

  
He first babysit my sister and me for New year's Eve. He and his girlfriend were having problems and we ended up talking about it. I have always been “logical” and straight forward in my thinking so I gave him my ideas as an almost 8 yr old. IE the innocence of youth. Being a pretty bright boy, it gave him insight to seeing things without the “blinders” that teen love can cause. 

  
He gave me a big hug and told me I was a really good boy and he said I thought a lot more like an older kid, instead of being almost 8. I was on cloud nine because this cool teenager was complimenting me and saying I was COOL.   
Everything was fine until the next time he babysat my sister and I. It was in that spring right around my mom's birthday in March. He was babysitting my sister and myself but he also had his girlfriend's little brother with him when he came over. He had already told my parents he had to watch him and they said it was okay. 

  
Just like on New Year's Eve he had me take a bath and he helped me again with it which I thought was kind of strange but didn't really say anything about it he was a guy so it wasn't like I had to wear a swimsuit in the bathtub like I did when a girl was babysitting. As you know most normal eight-year-old boys doesn't want to be seen naked by a girl. John was real polite and positive and told me that Eli, his girlfriend's brother who happened to be in my class, had already gotten ready for bed and so he wouldn't be taking a bath. It was just me. I didn't think much of it I was eight. John played with me tickled me in the tub made sure my hair was good and washed and told me he had to check my backside to make sure I was clean back there which I thought was strange. He then made sure that my privates were very clean and took the time to clean them which got my attention really quick. After that he told me to hop out. He wrapped me the towel and we went into my room. He helped me put my pajamas on. I told him I was a big boy & I didn't need that help. He told me “I know you're a big boy but that's okay I'm the babysitter so you got to do what I say and I'm going to help you”.

  
I got dressed and it was still early so we went and watched a little TV. My sister being blind, deaf and having other mental health issues, was changed and put to bed early by him in her room. Then when we got done watching TV, he told us that I and Eli were going to lay in my bed for a while and we would all hang out. So we went in to my bedroom. Once we got in there he decided that he wanted to teach me how to be a “big boy”. 

  
I asked him what he meant and he said that big boys make themselves and others feel good. Its even better to other boys feel good, especially older boys. 

  
I asked if Eli was a “big boy”. 

  
John said “no, Eli is a little boy because he still wears diapers because he wets the bed.”. 

  
At that point he told Eli to pull his pajamas down and sure enough he had on very thick diapers and was already wet. John started to tease him a little bit about being a little boy or just a big baby.

  
John then said “little boys only get to suck on a special pacifier because they're a big baby and don't get to feel good like big boys do..” 

  
At that point John reached down and pulled my pj's down and said that I had a little dickie, almost baby size so it would be perfect for Eli to use this as pacifier. At that Eli started crying and said he don't want to suck it.

  
John told me that since Eli was a “little boy”, little boys only get a suck on pacifiers they don't get to do the rest of the fun things that big boys do. Now it was my turn to learn all those fun things. I was scared, and then John started fondling me. After a few minutes of that John told me he was going to show me where else a boys can feel really good, and since I had a baby dickie it is what would make me feel good. I was embarrassed with his saying I had a baby dickie, and I tried to complain, but he gave me a swat on the butt and told me to “behave or ELSE”. Now I was even more scared.

  
He told me to turn around, bend over and stick my butt out at him. I didn't know why he wanted to look at my butt but I was scared to not do what he told me to do. He then took and ran his finger down my butt crack and said you got a nice bubble butt. Then he pulled my undies down to my ankles. Then I felt his finger trying to push into my butthole and I told him that was dirty and not to touch me there. He gave me a SWAT on my butt and said don't talk to him like that! 

  
Then he told me “this is your little boy hole and it will make me feel good and make many others feel good too.” He was going to teach me all about it. I looked at him scared and he had a weird look on his face and his tongue was licking his lips, like he was drooling over a special meal. 

  
He then proceeded to go get some lotion and lube up my bottom with his fingers. After a couple minutes I told him it felt really weird. He reached around and noticed I had a little erection. 

  
He says “obviously you like it, that's why you're got a little boner”. 

  
I felt really embarrassed and told him to stop. He said he was in charge and this is what big boys do to smaller big boys. If I want to be a big boy had to learn this or I would end up a lonely big baby. Since I had no older brothers that he was going to do me a favor and teach me.

  
Over the next 30-40 minutes he played with my bottom. I was also embarrassed because Eli was laying on the bed and watching everything happening to me. He had a look of interest, but also one of fear in his eyes. John had eventually gotten several fingers in me, as he kept telling me how much I liked it because I was hard the entire time. 

  
He tried to penetrate me with his penis but I screamed because it hurt so much. He told me to be a big boy and suck it up, and that the pain would be gone once he was in. He put his big dick at my butthole again, and pushed but it hurt to much and I was crying and screaming for him to stop. 

  
He stopped and told me I wasn't ready for that just yet but he would show me some other stuff. At that point he told me to lie down and watch what else I need to learn to do. 

  
John told Eli to take off his pj's so he was only in his diaper. John told him he knew what to do and to watch his teeth. Eli nodded and John said it was time for Eli to suck on his dick or for Eli its his “special pacifier” because he was a little boy.

  


Eli started to cry a little bit but John gave him a SWAT on the leg and said do it. So Eli took off his pajamas and sat there in his wet diapers. John told him to be a good little boy and ask for your pacifier. Eli looked like he was going to cry, but the then asked John if he could suck on his special pacifier. 

  


  
John told him he was a good little boy and that he could stuck on the pacifier. 

  
At that point John had Eli slide over on the end of the bed. John stood up and proceeded to put his hard-on into Eli's face. Eli then opened his mouth like he was taught to do. Then John started pushing his penis into it. John started making weird noises and told Eli to suck on his pacifier and use his tongue.

  
I couldn't believe what I was seeing but I also didn't really understanding it. I wasn't sure what was really happening, but I just thought it was dirty. I realized I had an erection going again because when John tried to put it in my butt, my dickie went soft fast. 

  
I felt like my body was betraying me because it wasn't supposed to be seeing stuff like this or liking it. But if I had a hard on. At that moment, John noticed I was stiff and told me I liked what I was seeing and wanted to try it. I was really confused.   
After about 5 or 6 minutes John made a really weird noise and told Eli to swallow it all. I thought maybe he was peeing in his mouth. But after a few seconds I saw white stuff leak out the corner of his mouth. After maybe 20 sec. John let go of Eli's head and told him he did a really good job he was a good little boy. 

  
Then he told me to lay totally flat on my back and Eli was going to show me how it felt to have my little baby boy dickie sucked on. I told him I didn't like being called a baby boy or baby boy dickie. 

  
John said well you may be a big boy but your boner sure isn't. I've seen 4-year-olds that have a bigger one. Then I started to cry a little bit. I felt hurt and betrayed. 

  
Then all of a sudden I felt this weird feeling of wetness and warmth was all around my dickie. I looked at my classmate and he was sucking on me like he did to John. I later learned it was called a blowjob or BJ. 

  
Eli was sucking on it with all the gusto he could. It felt really weird and really good but also kind of dirty at the same time. After a couple minutes I told him I had to go pee and John told me that I wouldn't pee it was my special feelings that I would get. To just go with it. I was scared because I did not want to pee in my bed. I couldn't take it any more, because I felt like I had to pee so bad. Then I just pushed Eli off me and ran to the bathroom. But, then I couldn't pee. 

  
After the hard on went away I was able to pee and then I went back into my room. John yelled at me told me that I was supposed to let him continue sucking on to make me feel good. He then gave me a SWAT on my butt told me to get on the bed on my tummy. I did and Eli was next to the wall in just his diaper. John started putting his fingers in my butt again then all of a sudden he touched something give me that made my whole body shake and tingle. I had no clue what was going on, I was shaking and my body was not in my control. John told me that's it I knew you were going to like this. Because my dickie was so small it meant my butt would be very sensitive. He also said he was going to make me get those special feelings again, and that I will enjoy it every time.

  
John said that it was time to get dressed and told me to just put my underwear on. Eli put his pj's back on, and his diaper bulge was even more noticeable now. Then we went back to the sofa and watched TV. John told me once we were on the sofa told me that this was boy stuff and not something that I need to tell anybody because I would get in trouble. I didn't want to get in trouble so I never told anybody. I tried once but my mom never understood what I was trying to tell her when I said I wanted to be a little boy and wear diapers and not be a big boy because it hurts to be a big boy. Mom just told me that I was a big boy and sometimes it hurts when your growing up and you just got to deal with it and keep growing up.

  
While watching TV I heard a little noise and saw Eli moving his head up and down. John was playing with Eli's hair, while he was sucking on John's hard-on John moaned and told him swallow it like a good boy. I stared in awe.

  
That was all that happened that night. But I didn't know that the following weekend my parents were having John babysit again and this time it would just be John, my little sister, and me.

  
The next weekend he comes over Saturday afternoon about 3:00 pm. My parents are having to leave early cuz they were driving a ways. John was going to be spending the night. My parents would not be back until the early afternoon or so on Sunday. 

  
My mom told me to “be a good boy and do whatever John says.” Off course John was there when she said it and he used that to his advantage the rest of the evening.

  
By 4:00 my parents had left and we were watching a TV. Then John wanted to play cards. 

  
As we were playing cards he told me that he was going to teach me some more fun stuff tonight. I told him I didn't really want to learn anything or do anything. He said “too bad your mom said do what I tell you to do and you're going to do it”. 

  
We had dinner around 5ish and after dinner he told me it was bath time. I told him I didn't take baths on Saturdays. He said too bad I'm telling you, you're taking a bath and you're going to get it now.

  
He filled the tub up and told me I can play in it, because he put bubbles in it for me. While I was in the bath, he got my sister changed put in her bed. After he was done with her, he came to check on me. I was pretty wrinkled he told me he was going to wash my hair for me. After that was done he decided he wanted to check the rest of me out and told me to stand up. When I did, he played with my genitals and made sure that they were clean and told me to bend over so he could check my bottom. I bent over and he told me my butt wasn't clean yet and so he was going to clean it. 

  
He soaped up his hands and then after rubbing my butthole for a minute or so with his fingers all of a sudden he shoved one finger in me. It hurt and I was not expecting it. He told me just to suck it up.

  
He started moving his finger back and forth and around inside me and it started to felt pretty good. It stopped hurting and I noticed that I had another stiffy going. John did too and said “see I knew you were going to like this.” Then he said, “You're going to really enjoy it when I take your butt.”

  
For probably 5 minutes or so he played with my butt with one finger. Then he told me just push out like you're taking a poop. As I did it, I felt something bigger slide in so I think it was two fingers and it hurt again. I was getting cold bent over like that in the tub with now cool-cold water. 

  
After I was clean to his satisfaction he told me to get out of the tub. He grabbed a towel and said “okay Champ I'm going to towel you off.” From that point on he always called me “Champ”. I hated that name. As I got older, I always saw the sexual connotations with that name, “Champ.” John or the other boys he shared me with, only called me “Champ”, and that meant he was going to use me for sex stuff and normally hurt me and not care about me as a real person with feelings or emotions or anything else. 

  
Luckily nobody else called me that growing up. But, it ended up costing me a relationship My Junior year in college because my girlfriend, called me” champ” as she was going to wash my back in the shower before we went out. I freaked out because I'd blocked everything out I didn't even understand why I freaked out. I went to my bedroom crying and locked the door. I told her to just leave and we could talk later. We were still friends, but my first relationship ended because of the abuse I suffered and suppressed.

So after he towels me off, he grabs and picks up my chubby frame. He carried me into my room and tosses me on my bed. I laugh and giggle. He tells me to “lay there for me and I'll be right back”. He went, grabbed his bag and brought it into my room. He pulled out this tube of stuff and said he was going to check my butt now. As he did that he took the tube and put stuff on his finger. He started playing with my butthole. It felt really weird but I got to a stiffy right away. He commented on it too. He told me to turn around and he was going to make it feel good for me. He started rubbing and playing with it. He still had his finger in my butt. Then all of a sudden he started sucking on it. I signed and then he pushed his 2nd finger in my butt. Then moving them around and making my butt hurt and but he touched something inside me again and it felt great. I was scared, and had no where I could go. I was impaled on one end and held in place by his mouth giving me a blowjob.   
All of a sudden I felt like I had to pee and I told him and he just kept sucking and play with my butt. He was pushing even harder with his fingers. I almost passed out as touched that special part of my body again and then my whole body just started to tingle. I just tensed up and I shook.

  
I didn't even realize that he had laid me down on the bed. He still had his fingers in me. I realized my butt now hurt again. He just pushed a third finger in and he rolled me the rest the way on to my tummy. He said “oh yeah this is going to be fun.” For probably the next 5 minutes he working those three fingers in until he could get them in fair enough without me grimacing and begging him to take them out.

  
He finally took his fingers out of my butt. He then told me crawl off the bed. I did as he stood up and told me that it was my turn to suck on his pacifier. I told him that I was a big boy He said that good big boys still suck on bigger boys pacifiers. I didn't want too. He said “you're going to suck my dick you little shit”. That's when he grabbed my head put his penis to my mouth told me if I touched it with my teeth or tried to bit him, that he would hit me so hard I wouldn't wake up until after my parents got home, if ever. I was so scared because my parents weren't there and he was babysitting me all night long until the next morning and I didn't know what to do. 

  
He tried pushing it and I would not open my mouth. He then looked at me and said “well if you're not going to pleasure me I know your sister will one way or the other”. He had an evil grin on his face. I could not let him hurt my little sister. She was handicapped and couldn't defend herself. I was the big brother and it was my job to protect her. I think he knew that and used that against me. 

  
So he looked at me and said “its going to be you or her”. I started to cry and lowered my eyes in defeat. He said “open your mouth” and I did. He then shoved his penis into it. I gagged on it real quick. I thought I was going to throw up and he just slapped me on the side of my head and said watch the teeth. I had tears running down my face, and felt like I had no choice but to let him do what ever he wanted, and I resigned to comply to his requests/demands.

  
Over what seemed like an hour but was probably no more than 5 minutes he slowly worked the first couple inches of his penis into my mouth. He called me HIS cocksucker and said you do it so good so just keep sucking on it. I did not even realize I was sucking on I was just trying to breathe through my nose and that thing being my mouth and it was big and filling my entire mouth up. I could barely squeeze it in to my moth and not rub my teeth on it. He told me to really start using my tongue on the tip of it and to suck on it like it was a bottle, or a pacifier, or my favorite lollipop. He reminded me that if I didn't he was going to hit me. Then I would have to watch as he did it to my sister. I looked up at him and just started using my tongue on it and did whatever he wanted. 

  
After a couple minutes he started moaning and held my head really still and said I want you to swallow it all. I didn't know what he was talking about. Then all of a sudden some stuff started filling my mouth. I thought it was pee at first and I started panicking. He looked evilly at me and told me to swallow otherwise you're going to choke on it and you'll die so swallow. I had no choice so I started swallowing what I could. It was coming out of my mouth dribbling down my chin and all over me.   
He was laughing at me, and he had an evil laugh that really scared me. When he was done filling my mouth, he finally took it out. He a little rag to wipe my face off. A little had spilled onto my chest. He looked me in the eyes and told me I “was his good little cocksucker”. I was scared of him and just smiled so that he would not hurt me or my sister.   
He said I was going to be doing that a lot for him from now on. 

  
I was scared to death. I didn't like that and I didn't want to do it. I was even more confused because he then said he knew I liked it and wanted to do it more because I got a stiffy from sucking on his cock. At that point I hated my body because it was betraying me. I didn't like the fact that I was overweight and everyone teased me for it. But now my body had a mind of its own and was betraying me and I couldn't stand that. I hated myself and my body as much as I hated John, if not more.  
I was mad & I was crying. I asked him why he peed in my mouth and he started laughing. He told me it wasn't pee it was his man juice. That it was really good for me because it was full of protein it would help me grow big and strong.   
He said it's normal for big Brothers to teach little brothers to do this and that's how little brothers grow big. Since I didn't have any big brothers he was going to be my big brother now and teach me all this so I could grow bigger and stronger.   
He then said that he would also help me so I could learn to be throw the ball better in baseball or football. Also how to catch the ball and then now I'm after school I can come over and hang out at his house listen to music with him and all that other fun stuff that he and his friends do because now I was going to be part of their group. He said if I could throw and hit the ball I would not be picked last for the teams. I hated be picked last all the time, so that made me think it might not be too bad and worth it.

  
I was confused because I thought it would be really cool to be hanging out with him and older boys. But I didn't like what he just done to me. He told me that it was normal for boys to do it and that it was a boy thing so it was no big deal. He was older than me, he was in high school, so I believed him. After he had me all cleaned up we went out watch TV. He had me only in my underwear, and he won't let me put anything else on. He had me sit on his lap. He had on a pair of shorts. As I sit in his lap, he started rubbing my thighs and working his hands up towards my privates. I could feel his hard on pushing into my butt. We snacked some more and then he said that it was time for some more fun now that we had extra energy. I asked him what do you mean?

  
He said “I'm going to teach you how to actually use that butt of yours to make you and me happy.” He then said, “there's two ways to get my love juice. Your mouth is one way but the second way is even better for you and that's in your butt because its closer to your privates to help them grow bigger, and by the size of that baby dickie, you need as much as you can get in your butt as often as possible.”

  
He then said I bet the reason your dick is so small is because you've never done and it means that you need lots of it.” 

  
He looked me in the eyes and asked me, “do you like having a little baby dick or do you want to have a big boy dick?” 

  
I said I didn't like having a baby one I wanted a big one cuz I'm a big boy 

  
He said, if I do what he tells me and get it lots of it his and his friends man love juice mine will grow big like his. At that point he pulled his shorts down and showed me his hard-on. To me it looked huge. Looking back it was probably only 6 or so inches, but it was also pretty thick. To me it looked huge, especially since mine was probably only 1-1.5 inches long when it was hard and not real thick at all I mean it was the size of a pinky. Even Eli's had been bigger than mine I found out later. John had showed me a Polaroid of Eli's and his was bigger than mine and so I felt really bad because if he was a little boy still wearing diapers and had a bigger one than I did that meant I really had a baby dick.

  
John went and checked on my little sister said she was fine. He told me to stand at the side of the bed so he could take off my underwear because that was something that big brothers do for the little brothers. I stood there and he took off my underwear. Then he played with my big butt. He told me “I like your butt it's going to be really nice and soft and feel great when I get in it. He was rubbing my butt, and I didn't know what he meant but I just said “okay.”

  
We crawled into my bed together and then he started rubbing his hands all over me. He was saying my skin was so soft. He kept reaching around with one hand and always rubbing it on my butt and the other hand would go on my tummy and my chest.

  
I knew my parents love me but they didn't show me a lot of physical affection besides the hugs once a day. My sister got almost all the attention and the affection. By 6.5 yrs old, or so, I wasn't even able to sit on Dad's lap anymore. Maybe once a month I could snuggle with Mom on the sofa for 10-15 minutes but that was really about it.

  
He pulled me in close to him so that I was up against his chest and then I felt his hard on rubbing me in my butt so I squirmed around a little bit so it wasn't poking at me. It ended up coming right up between my legs. He reached down and chuckled. He said, “it looked kind of funny with my little baby dick there and his big cock next to it. There is such a big difference”   
I felt really embarrassed and minuscule at that point. I think he realized that, as I was withdrawing so he put his arms around me into a big hug. He was rubbing my chest, it kinda tickled. He was telling me that I was special and that he cared about me.   
He asked if I liked being held, snuggled and cuddled. I told him yes.

  
He said you'll get lots of that too because that's what big brothers do for little brothers we hold you and and make sure that you're nice and close when we love you. I was shocked when he said “love you”. 

  
I asked him if he really cared about me? He said, yes sweetie I will even show you tonight how much I love you. I didn't know what he meant then, but found out the hard and painful way later.

  
He told me that he was going to make me his little lover. He told me I would get to that special feeling from him because he loves me. 

  
After another 5 or 10 minutes of snuggling, while he was slowly rubbing his penis in between my legs, John told me that I needed to roll onto my tummy for a few minutes. He was going to show me how good the special feeling can be from just touching my butt.

  
I wanted to make him happy because I like being close to him and it made me feel good when he was holding me. So I did whatever he wanted. I was laying on my tummy, he then proceeded to play with my butthole again and start working his fingers into me some more for the next probably 10-15 minutes. He said he had three fingers in me. I said it hurt. I had some tears and was crying a little bit and he told me, I was a big boy so tough it up you WILL do this.

  
Then he said that if I didn't then I couldn't hang out with him and he would never show me how to do any other things that boys do and how to be good brother. I wanted to be a good brother for my little sister so I thought I could learn things from him on how to be a better big brother. At that point I made the commitment to give in and do whatever he told me to do.  
He continue to play with my butt. He got it dilated but he was getting very forceful with it and every time I objected he would give me a SWAT on the butt and tell me that he knew what was best. He reminded me that my mom told me to be a good boy and do what he said so I needed to do it.

  
I wanted to make him happy even though it hurt I just kept biting down on the pillow or my tongue, lip whatever I had so I wouldn't make any loud noises as he kept pushing his fingers in and out.

  
It started to hurt less and then I realized that he had probably all three fingers into me is when he said I think you're ready to really learn what it feels like to make a big boy happy.

  
I didn't know what he meant until John pulled me up by my waist into so I was on my hands and knees. I know now its the doggy style. He told me to stay just like that as I had my knees underneath me my head on the pillow.

  
Then he told me that he was going to give me his love juice AKA “cum” in the best way so I can absorb it and grow bigger.   
He started rubbing more lotion or what I thought was lotion into my butt and I heard him also putting some it sounded like on himself but I wasn't sure where cuz I wasn't looking. I had my head face down in the pillow and was just trying to deal with everything going on. I was kinda ready for him to put his fingers back into me, when he reached underneath and noticed I had an erection. He said, “oh you really do enjoy this don't you. Don't worry I will give you more to enjoy and we will do it all the time.”

  
I was even more upset at my body because I was scared more than anything and didn't know I had a stiffy going. At that point he told me to bury my face deep in the pillow and if it hurt or anything to keep my face in the pillow and not to move. I could cry or yell into the pillow but he didn't really want to hear anything.

  
Then John put the head of his penis at my young little virgin butthole. He told me that to push out when I felt the pressure. To push like I was taking the biggest poop ever otherwise it was going to hurt really bad. As he started to put the pressure on my virgin butt hole it hurt too much and I pulled away from him which really upset him!!! John gave me a very hard smack on the butt and said don't do that again or ELSE! The look on his face and is eyes told me not to move again or I would really suffer.

  
Then he said that if I was too much of a sissy, he would do it my sister. And that would mean was bigger, braver and tougher than I was.

  
He sure knew how to push an 8-year-old's button because you don't tell an 8-year-old boy that his 5-year-old sister is bigger tougher and better than he is.

  
John could see the look of my face that I was determined then to prove him wrong that I was not some little sissy. I knew that it was going to hurt, and would hurt her even more. I did not want him to hurt my sister. At the same time if what he had said was true and it would help make me grow bigger and stronger and have a bigger thingy (as I had called it, or stiffy) then it would be good in the long run so it might be worth it.

  
I got back in a position put my face in the pillow and stuck my butt at him, knowing that it was going to hurt but that I had to do this.

  
It was the most pain I've ever felt in my life, over the next 30 seconds. He grabbed me by the hips. I felt this big thing pushing at my butthole and all of a sudden I had this giant searing pain as I screamed. He grabbed my head and pushed it back down into the pillow and told me to “just take it.” I was crying my eyes out. He told me I was a good boy, and that he had the tip in and that that was the hardest part. 

  
He then said “WOW, you are so tight! That's the best pussy I've ever had.” Being 8 I had no clue what he meant when he said pussy. We had show dogs and I thought the female dog had a pussy so I was confused but never really understood it at that point. Later on he then explained what he meant when I asked him when we were all done why he said I had a pussy.  
At least he was somewhat kind and went semi-slow. Every time he pushed in a little bit probably couple of 1/2 of an inch or an inch I would tense up and start crying a little more again. It really hurt and I felt betrayed. I hurt bad for probably 5-10 minutes. Then one last push and pain and then I felt his pubic hair on my butt. John then told me that he was all in and now the fun was going to come.

  
He then proceeded to go back and forth real slow at first and then speed up just taking a little bit out and then back in and then all of a sudden he started going harder and harder with more of it. It really started to hurt bad and I was crying again.   
He then told me that I was acting more like a sissy than a boy. If I was a big boy I should just tough it up and take it. He said this “was good for me and will make me a better and stronger boy, and that he will give me a lot of practice to get use to it.”

  
This lasted for what seemed like hours, but was most likely no more than 5 minutes after he started to pound my butt. Then he pushed in as hard as he could and pulled me back into him and said I'm cumming.... I felt him shoot his sperm in my butt.   
I now understand what that was, at the time I had no clue all I know is he grabbed me by the waist really tight pushed in really hard and told me he to enjoy it.

  
After I was done with my crying and just staying still as he was still in me, he told me “see you liked it. You should thank me for giving you my man love juice, and making you a Big Boy now.”

  
I didn't say anything at first so he gave me a SWAT on the back the head and said I didn't hear you. So I lifted in my head off the pillow and said “thank you for giving me your love juice thank you for making me a big boy.” 

  
He had a very evil smile going and said “you're welcome I'll give it to you as often as I can.”

  
He started to soften and he pulled out.

  
I started to move and wanted to get dressed. He took my underwear away from me and told me to not move. I was scared.  
Probably 30 seconds later he returned with toilet paper and wiped me down a little bit and shoved into my butt. I asked him why he did that he said this way it'll keep his love juice in me and I won't make a mess.

  
At this time it was still early so John said we were going to watch TV. I reached for my underwear he said “nope you can't have those yet”. It felt really weird to be walking around naked. Especially because he put his underwear on and I was the only one naked. 

  
As we were watching TV later on he reached down and started playing with my penis and told me that was a good boy and that one day if I kept doing that this my penis would grow bigger like his. He then took it out from his underwear and showed it to me. He stuck it right in my face and it was getting hard.

  
He then gave me a choice of either taking his love juice in my mouth or my butt again.

  
He said he was ready to give me my next dosage. I was scared!!! My butt still hurt, and I think John realize that when he looked at me. So instead of letting me choose, John just grabbed the back of my head and started pushing it toward his cock. When it touched my lips and I didn't open my mouth. He swatted me in the back to head again and said “take it you know you want it, or else your tight pussy will get it again.”.

  
Well we were laying there watching TV he made me suck him off, and work as much of it as he could in my mouth and tried to get it in my throat. When he came he pulled it back just so the tip was in my mouth. He told me to swallow it all and if I spelled it I'd have to like it up.

  
I wasn't well trained yet, as he would keep teaching me, so I couldn't swallow it that well and I made a mess. When he was done coming he gave me a SWAT on the butt said I made a mess and I had to clean it up and in doing that he then stretched out and told me to lick it all up. I had to lay there and lick his entire crotch and penis up to make sure there was no cum anywhere.

  
I felt degraded and miserable at that point realizing that I had to do whatever he told me to do. Not only because he was older than me but also my mama told me to do whatever he said.

  
I fell asleep on the sofa with him and woke up in my bed the next morning with him snuggled next to me. I still had nothing on. I went to the bathroom because I had to go pee and maybe more. I was not sure. So I sat on the toilet. I was scared really bad when I sat down thinking would be full of blood when I went to the bathroom... I was relieved that after making a lot of weird farting noises and trying to be able to go number two I didn't have a lot of blood in the toilet. Actually there was basically none there was a couple little red spots in my poop. I wasn't sure if it was blood or anything else. I was sure that my butt still hurt, and hurt when I went poop and wiped it.

  
After my butt was clean and I flushed, I just felt like I needed to cry. I sat back down on the toilet and started crying. I guess John had moved or somehow woke up and heard me crying in the bathroom so he came in and asked me what was wrong and I told him that my butt hurt. He said “you'll get used to it it will stop hurting after the first couple times, so by next weekend it will just feel good and be fun”. I looked at him and was scared as what he said soaked in...

  
He then said, it was not quite breakfast time yet we should go back into bed and he would hold me and cuddle me and I'd feel better that way. So I agreed.

  
We went into my bedroom he laid down and put his arms out and I kind of crawled up into his arms. He held me and that felt really good. 

  
He started running his hands all over my body again and even gave me a kiss on my neck and said that I was so cute. I didn't think I was cute I thought I was fat. Only my mom or grandma had ever called me cute so now I was blushing and kind of Happy. 

  
We laid there and I fell back asleep. Only to awaken to pressure in my butt again. John now had me laying on my stomach while he was working his fingers into my butt, getting me all lubed up for my next penetration.

  
John said I needed more of his love juice so I'd go big and strong and that he was going to give it to me the best way possible. Also this way it wouldn't interfere with my breakfast. 

  
He said he was going to go a little slower this time and see if I would get a special feeling. I didn't know what he was talking about, so I just kind of nodded my head. When he told me to get into position on my knees, I did and put my face into my pillow. 

  
It hurt!! My butt was already burning some before, he started to put anything in me. But, it didn't quite hurt as much as it did the first time.

  
He took his time and was a little more gentle. All of a sudden I started to get some weird feelings going inside me.   
He reached down, felt that I had an erection and told me that I was liking it and that I wanted it! Now I was going to be his little lover because that's what I wanted, needed, and my body wanted. 

  
He was going to make me grow big and strong. I felt really confused cuz I didn't think boys were lovers. Back in the 70s that was a bad thing , I did not want to be called a fag, faggot or gay. Because that was the worst thing you could be. 

  
It's took who knows, 20- 30 minutes as he proceeded to mount me hardcore. He brought me to my first orgasm. I about passed out. He told me that since I got it without touching my dickie it meant I was a bottom boy and needed to have other boys dicks in my butt, I was confused by that and the strange feelings I was getting from my butt with him in it.

  
I had my second orgasm when he was working me hard and he came hard in me. 

  
John told me that that was really special and that meant we were bonded together. 

  
He told me that he had now breed me and made me his lover, and since I got my special feeling (orgasm) when he got his it was more special and that I really loved him doing it to me.

  
I give him a weird look and he said don't worry about it it just means that you love me being in your butt, and I will give you lots of love, and help you grow big and strong.

  
He cleaned me up and put more tissue in my butt. He let me put on my underwear. We had breakfast, and then he told me to go try to go poop. He walked into the bathroom with me and gently rubbed my head as I tried to go poop and make all kinds of farting and spurting noises. After about 5 minutes I said I could not go anymore. He told me to stand up, so he could clean my butt. He got a wash cloth wet with warm water and cleaned my butt very well. He said I looked fine there, and that he would check it tomorrow when I come over to play catch.

  
I pulled up my undies and said, “ play catch?” He said yep, I want you to come over every day after school, and when you can on weekends and we will play catch, or football or even card games. Your my special friend and like a little brother to me, so now you need to come over and hang out with me. I'll introduce you to my friends and you can hang out with all of us. I felt really special now being able to hang out with these teens. Little did I know that it also came at a price, not just to John, but they got help make me grow bigger to, as John would tell me. 


	2. Shared with his friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most Importantly please remember that it is fine to read, fantasize, dream, and look at boys, but it is NEVER OKAY to HURT THEM. Don't steal their innocence! Boys deserve to know that they are loved and wanted, and that is done with hugs and positive re-enforcing comments. Not used and abused by someone that wants them as a sex object or “toy” to satisfy their lustful and selfish needs. Thanks.

Learning How to be a Big Boy, Chapter 2 (of 3)

On Monday I did my homework after coming home from school. As my mom got home I was outside playing and then saw John pull up in his Mustang. It looks like he'd been playing sports of some sort. I think he's played baseball which I later found out was exactly what he played in Spring. 

On Tuesday it was pretty much the same as Monday I saw him get home. He saw me looking through the fence and he waved at me and that was it. 

On Wednesday I was out in the backyard playing and I heard a car pull up next door in their driveway. I looked out and saw John's mom helping him out of the car it looked like he was injured and had stuff on his shoulder and arm. He was dressed in his baseball outfit still. 

On Thursday about 15 minutes after I got home from school there was a lock on the door and it was John. I was surprised and a little shocked. He told me that he got hurt in baseball and would not be playing for a couple weeks so that now he could spend the whole time helping me learn to catch and other things like that after school. That evening after my mom got home he came over and knocked on the door and they talked for a little while. She told me later that because he was injured he couldn't play but they wanted him to keep moving around so he was wanted to know if I wanted to play catch and other things like that. She thought it was a good idea so that she was going to have me go see him and play with him in the afternoons after I came home from school and got my homework done The only problem is she had no idea what he really wanted me to catch and play with.

Friday I got home, didn't have much homework to do, so I went over to John's house about the time I knew he'd be home and sure enough he was there. We played catch in their backyard for a little while. He told me that he'd hurt his arm and so he couldn't throw the ball with his one arm but he could still catch and throw with the other arm and then he just had to be real gentle with the arm he hurt. Looking back I'd say he probably sprained his shoulder or his elbow cuz he could still use his hand just fine to grasp me when he wanted to. 

When we were little tired from playing catch he took and showed me his room and all the cool posters he had on the walls. As we were talking about the posters he had me sit on his bed and he started rubbing my back as he was telling me about the different posters and telling me about his Rock music. In less than 5 minutes he had his hand in my pants and was squeezing my butt. Then he took his hurt hand and unzipped his fly and told me that he wanted me to make him feel good. He said he was not able to do it himself because of his hurt arm.

I had hoped that I could make him happy by only reaching and touching him with my hand and trying to make it feel good that way. But he wanted a whole lot more. 

In a few minutes John told me I needed to kneel on the floor in front of him and suck on it. I told him I didn't want too. He told me he'd tell my mom that I wasn't behaving when I came over or he'd give me a spanking himself. I didn't want either one of those because my mom would yell at me if I wasn't behaving when he was being “so nice to me”, as she thought.   
I went ahead and kneeled and started to lick his cock. Then he grabbed my head and told me to open up and he shoved the whole cock head into my mouth. He told me to suck on it and lick it and he would get my special treat real soon. 

It was better than him trying to shove it down my throat so I went ahead and did that for him because I knew it would be a whole lot worse if he grabbed my head and tried to push it all down my throat again. It didn't even take him a minute before he grabbed a hold of my hair and started thrusting in and out for a few seconds. Then he just held my head still as he filled my mouth full of his cum. As he was doing that he told me to swallow it all bitch. I felt degraded because it was a bad word used like that because I knew “bitch” meant a female dog in heat. I didn't want to swallow it, but I knew I didn't have much choice. Besides, it was better than having him put it in my butt which really really hurt. 

I found out a few minutes later that he was expecting a friend to show up. One of his best friends whom he had told about his new little cocksucker. When his friend got there and saw me, he said to John “what you started without me?” John's response was that he had to make sure the cocksucker was still remembered how to do it. I was blushing and really embarrassed by this. 

Then his friend came over to me, messed my hair up and told me to get on the knees in front of him and show him how good I sucked cock. I said “no” and he slapped me in the back the head and said you don't talk back to me or else. 

With that he reached down and and undies down, and grabbed his very hard cock. His cock was about the same size as John's. It was sticking me straight in the face. He grabbed my head and started pushing it toward it and told me to open up. 

I knew I didn't stand a chance with the two older boys so I just did what they told me to do. He started by having me just suck on it. Then he started thrusting it in and out, in and out, in and out. I was gagging and he was laughing at me. He proceeded to have his orgasm rather quickly and made me swallow it all as well. When he was done he pulled his shorts and underwear up ruffled my hair and told me not bad but you need to work on it more. 

Then they started talking and John put some music on and told me this was a really cool band named KISS. Well that was going on I was looking at the movie pictures and all the other posters he had. Because he had all kinds of different things that were really cool, especially to an 8 year old. 

All of a sudden I realized they were whispering to each other and I looked and saw they're both very hard again and I had a bad feeling that something was going to happen or that I was going to be forced to do stuff again. 

I saw John look at the clock and he said only enough time for a blow job from his little cock sucker. He told me to come over and get down on my knees in front of him and to suck him off again. I said I didn't want to do it cuz I already done it once. So he grabbed my hair and said too bad you need more practice.

With that he went ahead and pulled down his pants and underwear. He next told me to start licking his balls. I did and then he told me to start sucking on him and play with his balls with my hands. So I did, as he had a couple inches in my mouth and I was full up.

He started grabbing my hair and saying all kinds of dirty things to me, and telling me I was a good little cock sucker. After a few minutes he gave me his cum. He forced me to swallow it, and used his fingers to get any I missed and made me clean them off.   
I had tried my best to swallow it all, but some leaked out which he finger fed to me. 

Just as he was finishing and pulling out of my mouth his friend was right there already with it waiting to go in. He grabbed my head and tried to push it all the way down my throat but I gagged and gagged and started pushing him off. He then settled for getting it as far in my mouth as he could and telling me to suck it, use my tongue a lot and a massage his balls. I did what he wanted and after a few minutes of him calling me degrading and vile things, he yelled at me he was coming in to swallow it all like a good cock sucker.

I did my best again and they use their fingers to make sure I got everything off my face and lick it all off them. When I was done they told me to stand up and they both told me, that wow I'm a good little cocksucker. That I obviously like it because I'm really hard. I was all embarrassed and started to cry. His friend said look the little faggot's crying now because he's scared that he likes being a cocksucker. 

After a minute or two, John grabbed, then me pulled me into him and gave me a hug. He said “it's okay it's just who you are. We all know you like it. Trust me you're going to get a lot better at it with all the practice you are going to get now.” 

About 15 minutes later we went outside and John told me it was probably a good time for me to go home cuz my mom should be home soon and his so with his family. 

I went home, washed my face and washed my mouth out a couple times with water trying to get rid of that nasty taste but I still couldn't. I even brushed my teeth because it felt like it was all over. 

My mom asked me if I'd seen John and played catch. I told her “Yes I played catch and his friend came over and we all played together”. She told me it was really good for me being around older boys that included me in things. Especially with my dad not being home much.

Saturday I was out riding my bike when John saw me and called me over and he had a tennis ball in his hand and said that would be easier for us to play catch with because it was softer and lighter easier to throw especially for me because I didn't throw very well. so in the street we stood there and played bounce the tennis ball and catch with it for about the next 30 minutes and his parents came out told him they were going over to see a friend and we be back sometime that night. not more than 2 minutes after they left my mom hollered over the fence she saw me out there and said that I had an hour more to play before I had to come back and get cleaned up so we could have an early dinner. after that John said here let me show you something. and he took me an extra me right into his room he proceeded to close the door behind us. he told me to go ahead and sit on the bed again. he put on some different rock and roll. I don't remember who it was, but it had a lot of guitar to it. I remember cuz I knew what the sound a guitar makes.

He went into a drawer and came out with a tube of something and then came over to me and told me to take off my shorts. said “I don't want to”.

He said too bad, your Mom told you to play with me for the next hour. I slowly went pushing them down he told me I wasn't doing it fast enough, so he just grabbed him and pulled them and my undies down to my ankles. He then had me kick off my shoes. He then pointed at my shorts and undies, and told me to take them all the way off. I guess he been waiting for this or hoping for this because he even had a towel in his bedroom that he went and grabbed. He laid it on the bed and told me to lay on it. He told me to lay on my tummy. As I laid on it, he opened the tube up and put some of it on my butt. (I know now to be some type of lubrication) He also put it on his fingers and started working one finger into my butt roughly.

I said it burned and hurt. I begged him to “please take it out.” He said “NO”, you're going to enjoy this and I know you want it as bad as I do. He then shoved a second finger in and I put out a little scream. He told me to shut up stop whining and crying like a big baby. 

At that point part of my head said I wish I was a baby cuz then he wouldn't hurt me. That babies were safe because they wore diapers. But I didn't dare say anything cuz I was afraid he would hit me and hurt me more. From this time on, I had a deep desire to wear diapers and be safe. This affected me and my thinking and desires for the rest of my life.

He continued to work his fingers into me for a minute couple minutes and then shoved a third finger in. I squealed again and he slapped my butt and told me to keep quiet. After a few more minutes of that he got up behind me on his knees and told me to get into the doggy style position if I remember what that was. I told him I didn't remember he told me to get up on your hands and knees just like you're playing dog or pony. 

I was obviously too slow at that cuz as I was moving he reached over and grabbed my hair and pulled back so I would get up on my hands and knees. When I was in that position he told me to lower my head down and put it in his pillow cuz he didn't want to hear me make any noise. He told me if I started screaming or crying he would spank me until I stopped. I knew that if I got spanked I would start crying and I would just keep crying too as long as he's spanked me. I knew that would really be bad so I did everything I could to try not to make any noise. 

At that point he paused for a second. I'm guessing he put some lube on his penis cuz he then took and I felt some pushing on my butt-hole again. It was a lot bigger than his fingers were. When I moved a little bit he gave me a SWAT on the butt and told me hold still, your are supposed to be a big boy. Besides you want this, I know it. Then you took his strong arm grabbed a hold of my waist. With his other hand I guess he was lining up cuz then all of a sudden I felt it on my side just as I felt him push into me and it hurt like all heck. 

I screamed into his pillow and cried and he still reached up and hit me in the back of the head. They had told me I was making too much noise. At that point I told him it really hurt and it burned and I really wanted him to take it out. He told me NO.

  
You want this and are enjoying it just as much as I do. So just deal with it you little faggot. He held it and stopped moving for a little bit, maybe 20 seconds. Then he pushed a bunch more in and I cried out some more at this point. I just kept crying as he kept pushing it in. Pretty soon I felt it all in me. It burned in my butt and I hurt so bad. But he didn't care! All he wanted was his release. I now realize that I had become his sex toy or his sex object and not a real person with feelings to him. 

I was no more than a real living sex toy or a real sex doll for him. I was just a way to get off. Soon to be for him and lots of his friends to get off in. 

He proceeded to pause a minute after he was all the way in me cuz he said I was so hot and tight he didn't want to come yet. Then all of a sudden he started pulling back and I thought he was going to pull it all out but he didn't, just shoved back in and it hurt some more. I just kept crying as he did this for what seemed like hours but was probably no more than a couple minutes. All of a sudden John called me his “little faggot” and that he was giving me his love juice that I needed to help make me grow. 

At this point he slammed it as hard into me as he could and just held me there. I could actually feel it in my butt like it was getting bigger and then getting warm and wet. I realized he was now shooting into me. He left it in for a couple minutes maybe, but felt like it. Then he just pushed me forward as he pulled it out as I was still crying. He moved off the bed and told me to look at him. I did and he grabbed my head and told me to lick it off so he could put his underwear on. I had to clean off his whole cock from him being inside me. It was disgusting. I felt so terrible and like I was worthless. He looked at the clock and said oh wow that only took about 10 minutes we have lots of time still. He gave me this really Stern and evil look and said “do not get off the bed or else.” He left the room for a minute.

I was scared so I just stayed on the bed laying there just the way I was on my stomach. He came back in a few minutes later and could hear I was still crying a little bit. He began to rub my back and told me it was okay. I was a good boy and that he knew I wanted it, liked it and needed it. He was just helping me out. 

He told me I was too shy to ask for it so he knew what I wanted and was just going to give it to me. At that point you put his hand down between my legs. I realized as he pushed his hand up that I did have an erection going after being stimulated anally. He said “WOW. you really did like that didn't you maybe we can make you have an orgasm here in a few minutes when we do it some more.”   
I squeaked I don't want to do it anymore. he slapped my butt cheek and said “That's not what your stiffy is telling me. Its telling me you liked it you want it and you want lots more of it. Typical little faggot.” 

About 5 minutes later there was a weird knock out at the main door and John told me not to move. He went out of his room. He closed the door. I guess he went to answer the door because no more than 30 seconds later he comes back and his friend from Friday was with him. He saw me laying on the bed and goes “nice”. I went to try to move and cover myself up. John BARKED at me not to move.

John then went and removed his shorts and told his friend to strip down so we could get back to having some fun. I looked over at him. At least John's friend wasn't bigger than John was.  
I was scared because I had a feeling what they were going to do and I didn't want it. But now again it was two to one, and I knew I had no choice. 

John's friend asked if he could go first and John said “what's it worth to you?” His friend said “what do you want?” John said some type of album and his friend goes deal. 

He went straight over to the bed lubed himself up pulled me up so I had my butt in the air, and head down in the pillow position. He started rubbing his hard on at my butt. John came over and looked me right in the face and told me “keep it down or I'll shove something else down in your mouth and your throat to keep you quiet.” At that point he grabbed himself as it was hardening and wiggled it in my face to make sure I understood what he was talking about. 

I put my head back in the pillow and pushed down into it so they would not hear my crying and screams. I felt his friend grabbing my waist even tighter. I felt him pushing it to my butt hole. John told him I had already been lubed up. He said I had already been done once already, so he could just go for it. He decided to go that way and see if I could take it all right away.

He just gave it one hard solid push and was all the way in me. I screamed even through the pillow. John hit me in the back of the head and told me “I'm not going to warn you again.”  
His friend seemed to be in heaven as he was mumbling and moaning. He held still for a little bit and then started pumping it all in and out. OUCH, he was not gentle at all. He went at it very hard. He was pulling it almost all the way out (and slipped out a few times) slamming it all the way back in, over and over. 

Then all of a sudden he would stop and wait for 30 seconds or so and start doing it again. I was confused because John did not do that. I now know that he was getting close and he didn't want to come yet so he was waiting so he could keep going and using me that way. 

John told him after a little bit that he needed to hurry up so that John can get his piece of the ass before I had to go home. Then his friend started going even harder and faster which I didn't realize he could, I'm crying because it hurt all over in my butt area. At this point I was trying to numb out everything in my body. All of a sudden I felt him pull me back onto him and he started to swell up and then I can feel the wetness and warmth inside of me knowing he was shooting in me. He held it there for a little bit and then leaned down onto my back and told me “Wow you are one good piece of ass.” 

John told him to reach down and feel how much I enjoyed it so he reached down and sure enough I still had an erection going. He said to me, “WOW, you are really a good little faggot. You really like getting it up your butt don't you.” 

I started crying more and John said that it was his turn now. So his friend got off the bed. John got it behind me again. He told his friend that “the baby faggot will clean it off”. So his friend come up pulled my head over toward the side of the bed and told me to start sucking on it. That I had to get it good and clean. Then he shoved it into my mouth. 

John saw this and then shoved all the way into my butt. I tried to scream around him shoving his cock into my mouth. When I started to make the noise he pushed it further so I would gag.

John said “I told you I would keep you quiet one way or the other.” I had tears streaming down my face at this time, and as he started to really pound into me they just kept flowing.   
John worked me hard for probably the next 5 or 10 minutes. He would slow down and stop, hold still for a minute or so and then get right back to it. All of a sudden, he made a weird noise, and slammed really hard into me and I felt him shoot it to me again. 

As he did that, his friend made a weird noise and started shooting in my mouth. I had to swallow that too. Once he was done he pulled out. But then, when John pulled out of my butt, he came around and made me suck him clean. He told his friend to go get some toilet paper to clean up the little faggot's pussy. He came back with some toilet paper wiped down my butt and then put a little bit in my butt-hole They said it was so I wouldn't leak in my underwear. John said “we're keeping part of us inside you so that you'll grow bigger, stronger and we know that's what you really want. I can see that you enjoyed it didn't you” as he reached out and grabbed a hold of my stiffy again. I said “no”. He said “that's not true. This tells me you wanted it and you liked it.” He was pulling on my stiffy. I was so embarrassed and so upset at myself that my body betrayed me. 

I just started crying some more. John slapped my butt and said “oh stop your crying like a baby. We know what you really are.” He then told me to get dressed. I had about 10 more minutes before I had to head home so then he went and got me a cup of juice. I drank my lemonade and then went home. My butt hurt and it hurt even to kind of walk a little bit, but I guess I was walking normal enough that my mom didn't even notice anything. 

When I got there she told me perfect timing cuz dinner was almost ready. To just go ahead and wash up. 

I told her I want to go use the bathroom. She goes “you can hold it just wait until after dinner”. I didn't want to hold it. I wanted to get them out of me as much as I could. 

Instead I had to go sit and eat and have a conversation with my mom about “listening to music and stuff with John and playing catch”. Because I knew I couldn't tell her anything else. After dinner I was finally able to go to the bathroom. I sat down and pushed it all out, everything I could. It burned and hurt. When I was done, I checked to make sure there's no blood in the toilet before I flushed it. There was none so I was thankful for that.

Nothing happened on Sunday. John's parents were home all day and they were around and all doing stuff together with some other family or friends over. 

Monday soon as I got home, I did my spelling words and other homework. There was a note that my mom had left for me. I should make sure to get outside and play since the weather was nice once my homework was done. 

So I went out and was in the backyard playing. Then John came up and looked over the fence and said that I should come over and play catch with him. He had the tennis ball again. I said I wasn't sure if I should do that. He said he'd talk to my mom and she wanted me to come out and play everyday with him. Being outside and being with John would be good for me. I reluctantly told him okay. I went over to the side gate and went outside into the street area where John was. We played catch for probably 15-20 minutes. Then he said he was thirsty so we should go in and have some juice. 

As we were inside having juice two of his friends showed up. The first one was there on Friday and Saturday. I found out his name was Michael and this other friend was George. 

After drinking our juice Michael suggested we go listen to some music. I looked at John with big eyes which said... please I don't want to do this. 

John said “yes that's a good idea lets all go in and listen to music and have fun together.”

George said “great I heard about this I can't wait.” We barely get in the room before I'm told to get up on the bed. They all drop their shorts and underwear down so they're naked from the waist down basically. George comes over grabs my head and says I hear you're a good cocksucker, so let me see how good you are. He then pushes it in my mouth. 

Thinking that maybe that's all I have to do, I try sucking as best I can. In a minute or two he's shooting in my mouth yelling at me to swallow it all. He's calling me all kinds of dirty words and after I'm done he looks to John and says “you're right he is one good little faggot, now let's really see what his ass is like. 

My eyes probably got the size of baseballs when I heard that. Before I knew what was happening, I had been totally stripped down and had two fingers shoved roughly into my butt. I was crying out and pain from that. Unfortunately I got an erection again as they were doing that and it was pointed out to George showing him how much I really enjoyed this. 

George was asked if he could be first and Michael said no you got his mouth first I want his ass first. With that I was re-positioned on the bed so that they could stand on the floor and shove it in my ass while I was laying on the bed with my face in a pillow now along the side of the bed. First it was Michael, whom used me as I'm crying. He's calling me all kinds of dirty words as he fills me up with his cum. Then they tell George to go ahead and have at my ass. George doesn't even take his time as he slams it all in and I pop my head up and squeal. I proceed to get slapped on the back of the head and told to shut up, cuz I'm a little faggot and I like it and want it so just get used to it.

George worked me hard and I can swear that his pubic hair is going to bruise my butt he's slamming into me so hard. Then all of a sudden he swells up and starts shooting into me. He grabs my butt and pushes it together as he pulls out. Michael asked him what he was doing and he goes oh this is how you keep it nice and clean and keep everything inside him. John goes that's a good idea I'll try to do the same. Then he gets up and slams it all into me. John was the biggest of the bunch. Even though I just been worked raw and was trying to numb the pain and ignore it I still felt it and put out a little bit of a scream but I kept my head down in the pillow this time. John rode me hard, long and then shot inside me again. Before he pulled out he told Michael to go get some more toilet paper so I didn't make a mess. 

Michael came back with some toilet paper. Then John pushed my butt cheeks together so that he could pull out and try to keep it all in me. Apparently it worked because he didn't make me suck it clean. Then he took the paper, wiped my butt crack down and shoved it into my butt-hole He told me that would help keep it all in me. 

These events were basically the be the same thing that happened all the way through Friday. Although one day it wasn't George it was one of John's other friends that was there but it was always at least three of them. On Friday Michael was there along with George and the new guy his name was Jason. The four of them took advantage of me and rode me hard. My butt hurt so much. I hurt every night when I went home and went to the bathroom hurt just sitting sometimes in the chair especially Friday night did too. I said that to John, that it hurt to even sit down anymore because they were so mean and hurt me so much. He told me they'd be more gentle in the future because obviously I wasn't used to it yet, but I was his faggot that's all I was. 

Saturday came and went I was busy working around the house with my mom and doing stuff. I never went out side and same on Sunday, as it rained a little bit so it's just basically I stayed inside. 

On Monday as I was coming home from school I saw that John's car was already home. I thought that was kind of strange. I hadn't been inside for more than 2 minutes when he came and knocked on the door and said that he had to go to the doctors today so he was home already. He was hoping I would come over and we could just spend a little time privately cuddling and snuggling cuz he knew I liked that. I said that my butt hurt really bad and that I would come over and do that but I really didn't want to do anything else. He said that was okay. So we went over and listened to music and he let me snuggle up to him. He kind of rubbed my chest & my back. I can feel he was hard and pushing into my back and my butt crack. He told me that he was really hard and needed some kind of relief. He said that he would give me the choice he put it inside me on either end I got to pick which one. I was mad because he said I did not have to do anything today, but he said that I needed more practice. Because of how bad my butt hurt I said I'd suck him. He said okay. He proceeded to have me give him not one but two blowjobs. After he came the first time he didn't go soft, in a demanding tone he told me to keep going. 

Tuesday was pretty much the same as it was a nice day I didn't have any homework so when I got home I was out in the backyard playing with my dog. I heard a car next door and it sounded like John's Mustang. Sure enough and when he got out he had George with him. But then another boy that was a little older than me but didn't look like a teenager. He looked a lot like George. Turns out it was George's younger brother and his birthday was on Wednesday so George was giving him an early birthday present. 

John came over and said that George's brother were there and we were all going to play catch so I went out and with the tennis ball and we were bouncing back and forth playing catch and found out his brother was just turning 12 years old tomorrow because he was 11 now. He was all excited and I didn't know why he was excited today but I thought it was just because it was his birthday. George told him that he was going to get his first blowjob and maybe even get to actually fuck somebody for the first time. That was his birthday present and he was all excited for it. Guess who that person was that had do the blowjob and whose ass was going to be fucked again was?? Yep me. After we're done playing catch, we went in and had some juice. I could tell that George's younger brother, his name is Benny, was just really excited and kept staring at me with a strange look in his eyes. I had no clue why but apparently George had made the comment when I came over that I was the one he was going to get a practice and learn about sex on. He told him that it I liked it and that I was one of those sissy boys that like to get it from other boys. So it was good to do that and he was all happy and excited for that. 

We're in the kitchen area drinking our juice and talking when John tell something to Benny. He walks over next to me and tells me to get on my knees. I look at Johnny... I said but we're in the kitchen. He says, no one's home so get on your knees NOW. I look at him and can tell by looking in his eyes that I better obey so I do what he tells me. 

John then tells Benny to go ahead and whip it out and tells me that my job is to make Benny happy since it's his birthday tomorrow. He says to Benny after he pulls it out that the little faggot will give you your blowjob first. Benny's probably 3 and 1/2 in maybe 4 no hair and he's all happy and giddy. He just steps in front of me and grabs my hair and pushes it right to my mouth. I open up and he shoves it at all in. I gag and push him back and everybody's laughing except me. They tell Benny you got to go slow, to to let him get used to it and then you can go farther in. Benny pushes the head all the way in. I start sucking on it and licking it and he's moaning and moaning and moaning. He starts pushing more in and then literally starts face face fucking me. He is pumping in and out in and out in and out. As he does is he starts hitting me towards my throat area a little bit and I gag a little bit but he doesn't even stop with that because he's in a trance. 

He lasts maybe a minute when he tenses up and start shaking but nothing comes out. After that he keeps holding my head and starts going again. They're laughing going “oh wow round two already”. This one time last for I guess 4-5 minutes. He again comes and doesn't shoot anything out and at this point they reach over to Benny to make him stop. 

John says “that's a good start we'll finish the rest of it off in the bedroom.” They pulled Benny back a little bit and pulled my head off his cock and told me I did a good job. Then John pulls out his cock and says he is really horny so now I need to suck him off and get my treat.

I give John his blowjob and it doesn't take that long, but I'm still not able to swallow it all. So he uses his fingers to make sure I clean it all up and then we go into the bedroom. At this point I'm supposed to give George a blow job. As once that is done, its time for Benny to get the rest of his present. So then I'm Benny's for the next hour John says. Then laughs and says “or however long he can go for.” 

This was what George got Benny for his birthday and apparently had paid for it. I found out later he'd given John some stuff to make sure that his little brother could learn about sex with the little faggot first hand and get a good lesson. So they had me strip naked first. Then I bent over the bed. Then they showed Benny how to lube me up. He was rather quick at one finger and filling it up and then they told him normally do two or three fingers, but I should be open enough for his little dick so it should be a problem. Then Benny gets right behind me and plunges it all the way in. I gasp and squeal/scream a little bit and I'm told to keep it down. Benny just holds it there because he's is overwhelmed by the feelings apparently. He starts to go back and forth and drive into me like a piston into me. He comes in less than a minute. Once he recovers, he is back at it full force and the older boys are laughing. Benny has three more orgasms over the next probably 25-30 minutes. After the last one he literally can't stand anymore. I was just thankful he wasn't anywhere near as big as John or George or anybody else that was raping and using me. Once he got in and I adjusted to it, he didn't really hurt that much. 

When Benny was all done they had me roll over and showed Benny that I had a hard-on going the whole time. That meant that I really wanted it and liked it. They asked Benny if he liked it and wanted to do me more in the future, since my hard-on said I liked it, and his hard on showed he loved doing it. Benny goes yes please that was the best feelings ever. At this time I had a few tears come down my face, because I feel like I'm property of John now, and being shared or sold to whom ever wants to use me.

This is pretty much how the rest of the school year went. I was over at John's most days after school. Sometimes on a Saturday but not normally on Sundays because his family had things doing and people over. Normally it was at least John and one or two of his friends, sometimes more. Any day that we had a holiday, ie.. no school yet the parents all had to work, John would come over and get me between 8:30-9:00. 

He told my mom beforehand that he was going to be home and thought it would be good for me to hang out with him, playing games and such. That he would even make me lunch. My mom thought that was a really good idea and nice of him, and agreed to it.  
  
What she didn't know was that they were going to be feeding me their cocks all day long on both ends and I actually ended up getting plowed at both ends at the same time for the first time ever. At that point, on that day there were four of John's teenage friends, Benny and there is another boy that was about Benny's age. Turns out he was actually friends with Benny and his brother, and his older brother was a friend of Johns too. He had heard how happy Benny was after his birthday and he wanted to try it out sex too. Since he was a newbie and a virgin all the way around, he got to ride me multiple times. He was the first to mount me. Then it was Benny next to mount me before the older boys stretched me out too much. Then it was the older boys. 

I did finally get a real lunch that day. They all stopped and had lunch as they were too tired and I got to eat lunch. They kept me well hydrated between drinking juice and their cum. After lunch is when I had my first double entry, ie one on each end and it was Benny and the other boy first and then when they were done they swap places and then when Benny was done in my butt the boy in front wasn't so then his brother went in and entered me rather quickly, and painfully. Every time they do that I still jumped and cried out a little bit but when you got another boys dick in your mouth you can't make too much noise.

Micheal tried it later with him in my mouth and John in my ass but that didn't work so well. because it could only go in a couple inches before I gag and they pushed me too far one point and I started to make sounds like I was going to throw up. S John made him pull it out of my mouth and my throat, He then said “okay that's not going to work just make him suck on it while we're in his ass.”

He said that's a perfect way to get ourselves cleaned up he can lick it clean and then suck the tip off again. Benny and his friend whose name was Lenard (Lenny is what his brother called him) became regulars. At one point Benny and Lenny were even doing it to each other while their brothers were having them suck them off. Turns out that that was one of the reasons why George wanted Benny to learn about sex was he figured then once Benny got hooked on sex, he could use Benny at home. 

At one point in the summer I watched the older brothers fuck their lil bro. And then they told them that I was for them to use and that they had to take care of their big bros because that is what a good lil bro does. So now I was the bait and payment for the other boys to be used by their older bros, and then they could use me to get their release and still do some fucking instead of only getting fucked.

I was always the one that was the main entertainment for all the boys there and there were at least 16 in total, including the 3 younger boys. Since only one boy was new he got to have a lot of “fun with me” first, and learn about sex. Even Lenny and Benny were both penetrated by some of their older teen especially their brothers and were enjoying it a lot. But the other boys and their brothers were much more gentle and kinda loving when they did them. One thing I never forget was they said to them, that if it hurt they would go slow or if they told him to stop and take it out they would. But I was treated totally different, if I said it they just told me to shut up and said that I wanted it and liked it and it was just a little faggot so it didn't matter anyways. 

That summer and school holidays the next year and even the next summer there were probably 10 other boys in the 10 to 12 range that were allowed to experiment on me and learn about the joys of sex. I preferred them because they were not so big that it hurt, except when some of them went to my school. There were a few older ones too that were young teenagers but it seemed like most were in that 10 to 12 range maybe even 13. Looking back at it, and they were always there with their big brother. They were always told this was a special treat and that it was a learning experience for them. They're right of passage and becoming a man. That at home their brother would teach him more of the ways becoming a man later. 

I figure that they were all probably you know having sex later with their brothers when they got home. Sometimes they would even not only have me give them blow job, but also to put a finger in their butt. Normally the boy would ask me to do it after the first time, and the first time it was the brother that told me to do it to their lil bro. Often they would squeal as they pounded into me harder. When you're dealing with the younger boys that didn't shoot there were times that John had me busy with just the brothers. I was often filled all day long because the younger one never seemed to run out of energy and when they did the older bros were ready to go again. 

I would get lunch besides the cum that the older brothers gave me and the older brothers would get one round in my ass but the younger brothers, the ones that were the 10 to 13 we're just having a go at me, over and over, and loving it, They would just go around and round and thought it was great that I would suck off the one that was just been in my ass while the ones doing me and then the third one's just standing there watching, and waiting his turn on me. It was like I was the most popular ride at Disneyland.

I figure over the two and a half years of John and his friends using me, I was probably penetrated-RAPED at least 1500 to 2000 times in my ass. And well over 1000 times I was forced to give oral sex. NONE of them I wanted! 

I didn't mind so much the younger boys because they didn't hurt and they were at least nicer about it, in general. There were one or two that were real jerks but so was your brother so I just kind of was like they were almost a smaller version of them. 

Some of them, I think especially after they started having sex with their older brothers, were more kind to me cuz they knew what it felt like and they enjoyed getting off but they also were didn't want to be hurt me either. Sometimes they would make sure I had an extra pillow to prop me up and you know even a couple times someone would sit there and rub my back and talk nice to me which was a pleasant switch. 

It's amazing how another boy can be kind of gentle while an older teen is ruthless, cold-hearted and rough. But I think that comes from he mostly begun on the receiving end of it as well, and feeling the pain and the shame of it as he was also used. 

The most disgusting day that I'll never forget was the day that John had several his buddies over and another boy who'd been there a few times I don't remember his name although he was kind of cute. He was really gentle, and so was his older brother. I'm looking back at it I'm sure at least one of them was gay just because of the mannerisms and stuff. They were probably doing it at home, but it probably was nowhere as rough or brutal as it would happen if John had been around or involved. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also want to thank a bunch of Nifty authors I have talked with over the last several months. You have encouraged me to write this, as have your kind, caring and loving stories. SO Thank you! This especially goes out to Knottedpup (Matties New Life is AWESOME!!!!)) ; (EricH (so many great stories for over 15yrs! What families are for is AWESOME, and Tutoring JJ, is a classic heartwarming tale of love between boys..., and the wonderful author (bottomboy) of: Founders School for Boys!!! (and Storiesfromthebearsden)


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